timaeusTestified [TT] joined chat
undyingUmbrage [uu] joined chat
TT: Yo.
uu: YOu. WHAT IS IT?
TT: What's what?
uu: DO YOu NEED SOMETHING OR ARE YOu JuST HERE.
TT: Just here. Though I figured you're about to tell me you want to kill me or someshit again, huh?
uu: BuT OF COuRSE. WHY WOuLDN'T I? I'M GOING TO KILL YOu AND AS YOu KNOW THERE'S NOTHING YOu CAN DO ABOuT IT. WE'VE BEEN OVER THIS THOuGH PROBABLY MORE THAN MANY TIMES.
uu: BESIDES THAT THOuGH WHAT ARE YOu DOING, YOu DuMB TIT.
TT: We've been over this at least 5 times now.
TT: Just checkin on the AR and shit like that. Why do you care?
uu: *FIVE IS NOT THAT MANY TIMES, OH BRILLIANT ONE.*
uu: AND,
TT: Five is plenty enough times to be reminded that you're going to kill me.
uu: I DON'T. AT ALL. LIKE, I LITERALLY DON'T GIVE A SINGLE CROTCHLuMPING FuCK ABOuT YOu. I'M JuST BORED AS SHIT.
uu: OH BY THE WAY, I'M GOING TO KILL YOU.
uu: YOu*
TT: Oh, uhuh. I totally believe that. You don't care at al-- Jesus shit, I know dude.
uu: YOu CAN ADD THAT TO YOuR LIST OF ME WANTING TO KILL YOuS.
TT: If you could kill me, you would have already. Instead of sitting there talking about it like a total coward.
uu: I AM NOT A FuCKING COWARD, YOU ASSGROPER. I JuST DON'T FEEL LIKE KILLING YOu RIGHT NOW, THAT'S ALL.
uu: YOu*
uu: *GOD DAMNIT I KEEP MESSING uP.*
TT: Dude, when ARE you gonna kill me then? I await with bated breath. I'm just excited for you to even try.
TT: Especially since you can't even type, bro.
uu: SHuT UP ASSMuNCH. I CAN TOO TYPE.
TT: Oh, okay.
TT: That was sarcasm, in case you couldn't tell.
uu: ...I SO COuLD.
uu: BuT TO ANSWER YOuR QuESTION ABOuT WHEN I'M GOING TO KILL YOu...
uu: YOu GET NO ANSWER. FIGuRE IT OuT YOuRSELF.
TT: Pft, fine, whatever. Doesn't matter when. Not like you actually could.
uu: I COuLD AND I WILL.
uu: BuT uH...
uu: DO YOu THINK YOu COuLD MAYBE DRAW SOMETHING FOR ME.
TT: ... Like what.
uu: ...YOu KNOW. ONE OF THOSE SPECIAL PICTuRES. MAYBE.
TT: Maybe. If I fuckin' feel like it. What do you want?
uu: YOu KNOW WHAT I LIKE.
TT: I'm not in a fuckin' creative mood, dude.
uu: OH COME ON SERIOuSLY JuST DRAW ME SOMETHING!
TT: Jesus fuck fine.
TT: You're really really fuckin' irritating.
uu: LIKE I GIVE A SHIT?
TT: I don't know why I draw you shit when all you do is threaten to kill me.
uu: I'M HERE TO BOTHER YOu.
TT: I'm aware.
uu: WELL GOOD.
uu: I WANTED TO MAKE SuRE MY INTENTIONS WERE FuLLY NOTICED.
uu: ABSOLuTELY FuCKING FANTASTIC.
TT: Yeah, yeah, you're noticed you whine-y little bitch.
uu: I AM NOT A WHINEY LITTLE BITCH, JACKASS.
uu: I AM SIMPLY SHOWING MY AuTHORITY OVER YOu.
TT: "Dirk draw me things" "Dirk I'm gonna kill you" "Dirk, Dirk Dirk Dirk"
TT: That's all I hear from you.
TT: Ever.
uu: I NEED TO SHOW MY DOMINANCE OVER YOu AT ALL TIMES>
uu: TIMES*
TT: Oh, you know how I like to be dominated.
TT: Dang, I bet your sister has written that or something.
uu: *YOu DON'T EVEN KNOW.*
uu: SHE WRITES SO MuCH BuLLSHIT.
TT: Oh man, has she?
TT: Jesus fuckin' christ.
TT: The only thing I've read from her was about me and Jake.
TT: I mean, what?
uu: SHE PROBABLY HAS SOME SHIT FOR EVERYONE THAT HAS EVER EXISTED PAIRED WITH SOMEONE ELSE WITH NO LEFT OVER PEOPLE.
uu: FuCK JAKE!
uu: ...
uu: NOT PHYSICALLY!!!
TT: ...
TT: You touch Jake and I will not hesitate to hurt you.
uu: I SHOuLD KILL HIM JuST TO SPITE YOuR PuNKASS.
TT: I will never draw you porn again.
TT: Ever.
uu: OH SHIT- NO!
uu: YOu MuST ALWAYS DRAW ME THOSE THINGS.
TT: Nope. You touch Jake, I won't.
uu: FINE I WON'T TOuCH HIM. FOR NOW.
uu: DRAW ME PORN!!!!
TT: Yeah, yeah, I'm working on it.
TT: Seriously though, why'd you get so mad that I mentioned Jake and me?
TT: Are you jealou, bro?
uu: OH! GOOD. THAT'S FANTASTIC-
uu: WHAT.
uu: WHY WOuLD I BE JEALOuS???
uu: YOu'RE A GROSS NASTYASS DISGuSTING HuMAN.
TT: I don't know. Maybe you've got some sort of alien hate crush on me.
uu: I'M SO MuCH BETTER THAN YOu. AND I'LL KILL YOu BECAuSE I HATE YOu SO MuCH.
uu: NEVER.
uu: FuLLY PLATONIC HATE. I'M SuRE.
TT: Sounds like a black crush to me.
uu: NO WAY IT'S TOTALLY PLATONIC!! THERE IS NOTHING NON-PLATONIC ABOuT THIS AT ALL.
uu: NOTHING WHATSOEVER.
TT: Getting defensive, are we?
uu: NO!!
TT: Dude, you so want me.
uu: WHY WOuLD YOu THINK I WAS BEING DEFENSIVE.
uu: THAT'S STuPID!
uu: WHAT IS THIS.
TT: You're stupid.
uu: NO YOu.
uu: YOu KNOW WHAT.
uu: FuCK YOu.
uu: tumut
uu: FuCK YOu A WHOLE LOT.
uu: FuCK YOu SO MUCH YOu BLEED FROM SO MUCH FuCK.
TT: Yeah, uh.
uu: ...WHAT.
TT: Not helping your case, broski.
uu: WHAT DO YOu MEAN.
uu: I'M SuPPOSED TO BE INTIMIDATING.
TT: That's not intimidating.
TT: That sounds like you wanna fuck me.
TT: Really hard.
uu: OH GOD.
uu: YOu HAVE A SICK THINKPAN.
uu: SO SICK.
TT: Do I?
TT: It's just the truth, dude.
uu: WHO SAID THAT???
uu: DO YOu REMEMBER ME SAYING THAT?
uu: *I DON'T REMEMBER ME SAYING THAT.*
TT: It's right there.
TT: uu: FuCK YOu. uu: tumut uu: FuCK YOu A WHOLE LOT. uu: FuCK YOu SO MUCH YOu BLEED FROM SO MUCH FuCK.
uu: THAT DOES NOT SHOW ANY PROOF.
TT: Denial.
uu: AND ANYWAYS WHO SAID ANYTHING ABOuT FuCKING YOuR BuNCREVICE?? I COuLD HAVE MEANT FuCKING OuT YOuR EYES OR SOMETHING.
uu: THAT SOuNDS A LOT MORE FuN.
TT: Gross, man.
uu: WHAT.
uu: WELL YEAH.
uu: OF COuRSE IT'S GROSS.
uu: DO YOu LIKE IT.
TT: No man, shits nasty.
uu: OH COME ON.
TT: What?
uu: WHAT DO YOu LIKE?
uu: I MEAN.
uu: JuST OuT OF CuRIOuSITY.
uu: NO REAL REASON.
uu: I'M MAKING A CROSSWORD PuZZLE AND I NEED A QuESTION. I COuLD MAKE IT *WHAT TuRNS DIRK ON*.
uu: YEAH.
uu: THAT'S A GREAT EXCuSE.
uu: ....
uu: I MEAN REASON.
uu: YOU SAW NOTHING.
uu: THAT WAS A TYPO AND NOTHING MORE.
uu: I SWEAR.
TT: Dude.
uu: WHAT.
TT: Why?
uu: WHY DID I ASK THAT?
TT: Yeah.
TT: Like seriously, what the fuck?
uu: I TOLD YOu. CROSSWORD PuZZLE. ABOuT YOu HuMANS.
uu: YEAH.
TT: Does it have to be me specifically?
TT: I mean.
uu: ...YEAH.
uu: IT DOES.
TT: You're just curious aren't you?
uu: NO THAT'S A RETARDED ASSuMPTION.
TT: ...Not really.
TT: Considering how you JUST talked about how much you wanted to fuck me.
uu: THERE IS A HuGE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN NORMAL FuCKING AND EYE FuCKING.
TT: You're totally into shit like that, aren't you?
TT: Gross, man.
uu: NO.
TT: If you're curious, I'm not.
uu: YOu'RE NOT WHAT?
uu: INTO THAT STuFF?
TT: Eye fucking.
uu: WELL IT'S NOT LIKE I'VE DONE IT BEFORE. IT MIGHT NOT BE VERY ENJOYABLE.
uu: FOR ME I MEAN.
uu: OF COuRSE YOu WOuLDN'T ENJOY IT.
uu: WHICH WOuLD BE THE POINT.
TT: Oh my God.
TT: Just stop talking about it.
TT: Boner kill.
uu: WAIT.
uu: YOu HAD A BONER?
TT: No.
TT: I was just stating a fact, dude.
uu: WELL THEN TELL ME WHAT GIVES YOu A BONER JuST OuT OF CuRIOuSITY THIS TIME.
uu: I'LL TAKE BACK ONE OF MY SEVEN OR EIGHT *I'M GOING TO KILL YOu*S.
TT: But, you've already said them.
TT: Why would I care if you take it back?
TT: Not like you'll be able to kill me.
TT: But that's besides the point. Why would I want you to know shit like that?
uu: ...BECAuSE. I CAN.
TT: ...
uu: PLEASE.
TT: Uhg.
TT: Fine.
TT: Wanna know what turns me on?
TT: Jake.
uu: ...
uu: ....
uu: .....
uu: ......
uu: .......
uu: IS.
uu: IS THAT ALL?
TT: Maybe.
uu: LIKE REALLY OR NO.
TT: Nah.
uu: WAIT SO THERE ARE MORE THINGS OR NO.
TT: Yeah.
TT: Rough sex. BDSM. Y'know.
uu: OH.
TT: Oh?
uu: JuST FIND THAT VERY INTERESTING ABOuT YOu.
uu: I MEAN IN A WAY.
uu: SINCE I OBVIOuSLY DON'T GIVE A TAINTFuZZ ABOuT YOu.
TT: Why's it that interesting?
TT: It's pretty fuckin common in humans.
uu: IT JuST IS!!
uu: AND I DON'T CARE. I HATE *HuMANS.*
TT: But you hate me the most, right?
uu: OF COuRSE!
uu: SO MuCH I'D KILL YOu.
uu: AND I WILL.
TT: Mhmm.
TT: Sure.
uu: IT'S ON MY SHIT-TO-DO LIST.
TT: Yet, I'm still alive.
uu: FOR NOW.
uu: YOu KNOW WHAT ELSE IS ON MY SHIT-TO-DO LIST?
TT: What?
TT: Not that I care, but, whatever.
uu: YOuR EYE SOCKETS.
TT: God damn it
TT: Stop.
TT: That's nasty.
TT: I fucking hate you.
uu: OH MY GOD REALLY?
uu: HOW MuCH.
uu: AND THAT WAS AN EXAGGERATION.
uu: I KNEW YOu HATED ME ALREADY.
uu: BuT EVEN SO, HOW MuCH DO YOu HATE ME.
TT: I would tell you, but you'd probably get some huge alien boner for me or someshit.
uu: NO WAY.
uu: SPEAKING OF BONER, HOW IS THAT DRAWING COMING ALONG.
TT: It's pretty much done.
uu: GOOD. ANYWAYS, YEAH. MY BuLGE IS ABOuT AS SOFT AS A MARSHMALLOW. TELL ME NOW.
TT: Nah. I'll keep you waiting and wondering.
uu: WHY???
TT: Cause you'll get an alien boner.
TT: Told you dude, I hate you THAT much.
uu: OH MAN THAT'S A LOT OF HATE THEN.
uu: TO KEEP ME ON THE EDGE LIKE THAT.
uu: YOu MuST REALLY HATE ME.
TT: Uhuh.
uu: HOT.
uu: JuST KIDDING.
TT: ... How's that marshmallow bulge going for you?
uu: ...
uu: WHY ARE YOu ASKING ME ABOuT MY BuLGE? YOu SICK FREAK.
TT: Obviously it's cause I'm SO in to you.
uu: OH MY GOD.
TT: I was kidding.
uu: ...OH.
uu: I SHOuLD CHAIN YOu TO A WALL FOR THAT YOu DICKASSED FOOT RuBBER.
uu: AND WHIP YOu.
TT: Woah.
TT: Dang.
uu: ALL DAY LONG.
uu: NEVER TIRING.
TT: Jesus shit.
uu: NEVER A YAWN ESCAPING FROM THIS MOuTH.
uu: JuST AMuSEMENT AND AN ENTIRE ROOM FuLL OF AROuSAL.
TT: So you DO have an alien boner for me.
uu: WHO SAID I WASN'T TALKING ABOuT *YOuR* AROuSAL? YOu SAID YOu LIKED THAT SORT OF STuFF.
TT: You'd like it though.
TT: I bet you'd be so turned on by seeing me like that.
uu: MAYBE BuT I CAN'T SAY FOR SuRE.
TT: Who wouldn't be though.
TT: Naked Strider.
uu: PRETTY MuCH.
uu: WAIT.
uu: WHO SAID NAKED.
uu: DID I SAY NAKED???
TT: You did.
uu: ...WHERE.
TT: Shh, only nakedness now.
uu: ..........
uu: .........
TT: I mean, you standing there whipping me? No fun if I'm not naked.
uu: OK.
uu: TRuE.
uu: I GuESS.
uu: uGH.
